Last week I lied to the cable guy. I'm not the lying type, so it has been eating me up. When I got up that morning, I didn't intend to lie. I threw on Mike's old fire department sweatshirt and went to work cleaning my house. I love that sweatshirt. It is so comfortable. Mike wasn't going to be there when the cable guy came, so I had a quirky thought that it might somehow protect me against this unknown cable guy. You hear all sorts of stories about cable guys, you know. Looking back, I think my first mistake was actually ordering cable. But we were tired of the three fuzzy channels that came in with our rabbit ears. (Even a good amount of foil gobbed on each antenna end did not help the clarity.)
So anyway, back to my story. The cable guy was supposed to come between 10 and 12, and as I bustled around the house clearing dishes and throwing in a load of laundry, Blake decided to puke his breakfast. Poor little guy. It was all over his clothes, the high chair and floor. Yuck. I had managed to get him stripped and wiped down when the knock came. No time to change my sweatshirt even if I wanted to. I greeted "Sean" the cable guy and let him in, then turned around to go grab some clothes for my diaper-clad toddler.
Then it came - the question. "LS Fire Department, huh?" Uh oh. I hadn't expected him to actually ask me about my sweatshirt. It was just supposed to provide me some intangible protection against the possible predatory cable guy.
I responded with a distracted, "Uh huh," hoping that he would let it drop. Nope.
"Do you work for the LS Fire Department?" He asked.
"No," I answered.
"Oh," he replied.
Suddenly, I felt conspicuous for wearing the dumb thing. Why was I wearing it anyway? After all, he looked nice enough. I said, "My husband does." Did, I added mentally. It lodged in my throat, and before I could correct my lie, Sean the cable guy had moved on to talking about how he wanted to be a fire-fighter and was applying at the Everett department. Oh great.
While I was putting clothes on Blake, I let Sean ramble and the whole time I was thinking about correcting my lie. But then he started asking about the fire department and how my husband liked it and I found myself answering about all the reasons Mike didn't like the department... How this particular department was very immoral and not a place my Christian husband wanted to be. In fact, his friend quit (last year) and Mike wanted to leave too (and did, last year.) Yep, I kept talking about the virtues of my faithful husband (with the wife who was lying her pants off at the moment!) I kept wanting to correct my lie - trust me, the Holy Spirit was giving me pricks of conviction - but I didn't want to sound like an idiot. Backtracking by this time would make me seem like, well, a liar.
Sean went about installing my cable box and gave his thoughts on the morality of the fire fighting profession. Then he asked me what church we went to. "Calvary Chapel of Marysville," I replied. His eyes lit up as he said that he goes to our sister church in Lake Stevens. Oh boy. I know people at that church... Figures that the one time I lie it would snowball. What a mess I got myself into. Why didn't I just rely on Jesus to protect me to begin with? Without even praying for my protection, He had sent a brother in the Lord to install my cable, instead of a weirdo. Oh Kim of little faith! Her sin just may find her out, to boot. He's been going there for six months and knows people I know.
The remaining time he was there, I wanted to confess. As he showed me how to work my remote, I wanted to confess. As we parted ways and he walked out the door, I wanted to run after him and confess my sin. But I didn't. I wish I had. But my pride held me back. I didn't want him to think less of me, or Mike for that matter... Poor Mike, with the lying wife. I had a wild thought after he was long gone that I could call the cable company and ask for him so I could confess, but he would have thought that I was the weirdo! (By this time, you're either laughing or shaking your head.) I've already asked the Lord's forgiveness for my lie - so Sean the cable guy, if you're out there, I'm sorry. Please forgive me.
Later, on the phone with my mom, I told her that I had lied. "You lied, Kimmie?!" I could hear the shock in her voice. I hurried to explain, and as she listened she giggled from time to time. I guess it sounded like a predicament only I could find myself in.
It is so therapeutic to blog this. Now that I have it all out, I won't beat myself up over it again. It is now a sin that has been thrown into the sea of forgetfulness, and I won't be fishing for it. And trust me, I won't be lying again!
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9 comments:
Oh, Kim ... you are the sweetest thing :) Yes, you're forgiven. Will it make you feel better to hear that I lied last Saturday? I was sitting in Starbuck's when this VERY predatory guy moved progressively closer and closer until he actually said, "Is anyone sitting here?" and pointed to the chair right next to me. I was very uncomfortable and I just blurted out, "Well, my husband will be in a little bit." (That was the lie.) He sat down anyway and said, "Let me know when he gets here." I kept typing, trying to ignore him, but he kept talking to me. He wouldn't stop, and I actually--at one point--looked around to see which man I might yell to for help in the event that the guy did something inappropriate. So I picked up my cell phone and called Dave, who was just leaving the house to go work at his office. And I said, "Hi, honey, are you on your way to Starbuck's?" And he said, "Well, I could be, if that's what you want." And I said, "Uh huh."
It turned out well ... but I still lied! THe good news is that I'm pretty sure you and I are still saved. :)
I know what you mean about the guys that work around the house like the cable guys. We had a dishwasher guy come here and I said, "Wow, you remind me of my neice's husband." He turned around and looked too interested and he asked, "Oh, yeah, is he a nice guy?" I didn't know how to answer that because "Yes" would sound like I was interested in him and no would be a lie and rude. I just turned to do my work and said, "Oh, he's an ok guy" and then I avoided any further conversation.
When David sinned with Bathsheba, he confessed to God, "I have sinned against you." If your lie would cause further harm to this person, you would have to make it right, but it won't, so leave it between you and God. You're right.
Shannon - You lied?? Wow, that does make me feel better! teehee ;) (Really, it does. lol)
I'm glad that Dave is intuitive! haha Mike probably would have been like, "Huh...? Whuh?" :D We'll have to work on that. lol
Darlene - Dishwasher repair men and shoe salesmen find you irresistable! ;) We're gonna have to dress you in a flour sack. hehe
Coincidentally, the cable guy reminded me of someone I know too. He looked like the pastor's son at his church.
Kim, I hope you are feeling better, I am finally over my sickness and raring to go.
The weather has been way to nice for blogging and so you will probably see me slow down until it get's cold again.
Take care of Abba's Girl.
Ok, I talk too much, but I have to tell this story. At the movies one night, my friend says, "Did you see that guy? He just mouthed the words, I want you." I thought yea right, come on, as if. Ten minutes later I see this guy totally checking us out, so I say to my friend, "is that the guy over there?" and she whispers "yea" As we start walking out, I notice he's following us and so I pause at a payphone to pretend to call home. He walks past and then we see him standing in the parking lot facing the door waiting for us. We walk back down the hall to the ticket counter and he comes back in and keeps staring like he is waiting for us to leave with him. I was really creaped out, and it's a long story how we finally got away.
It reminded me of Shannon's 'Star Buck.'
Maurice - Thanks! Sorry I've been so sporatic about posting!
Jessica - Thanks for checking out my blog! :)
Darlene - Oh my goodness girl! You sure get into scrapes with guys! Maybe you should embroider "TAKEN" on all of your shirts. hehe Or maybe on the butt of your jeans where they are obviously looking! haha
Kim: Thank you for your genuiness and your articulation of the stresses and consequences that come from even the smallest sin. It is nice to read reality in struggling to be like Christ. Thank you.
You are a good writer. Your blog looks much like mine, BEFORE my transformation last week. I will bookmark you and look forward to reading more. God Bless!
Kim, I've really enjoyed reading your blog. This story was so cute and so understandable. I have to confess--I lied in the sanctuary last Friday--when I fessed up to my friend that I had referred to him as my husband-he said it may not be a lie-just a little early presumption that could be remedied! Yes, I know, it's still a lie but it did help me out of a very uncomfortable situation.
Take care.
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